&gt;&gt; Can you tell us about a time when you might have done that to yourself where you said, this is a big decision, maybe got into your head a little? &gt;&gt; God, I wish I could go back to my old self. I wish I could go back to myself when I was in my mid twenties and my early thirties, cuz there's so much pressure I put on myself to get it right or get the promotion in the first year instead. And at the time, those were really big decisions and I'll give you one example. When I started at the firm, you would make senior in three year and I was lucky enough to make it in two. And then manager typically would be six and I wanted to do it for and I put so much pressure on myself to get it in for, get it in for and keep the pace of my advancement. I lost sight of other things. I lost sight of my health. I lost touch with my friends a little bit. And if I go back, I just say whether I made manager in four years or five years, it didn't matter. Again, it's easy to say that now, but that will be a great example where I just put too much pressure on myself and it didn't matter. &gt;&gt; When you realize that you were doing that to yourself, how did you stop that and how did you change? &gt;&gt; I looked in the mirror and I just said, I wasn't satisfied with who I was. I wanted success to be much broader. I wasn't happy physically. I also realize I was leaving people out. I was leaving people in my life that mattered. Different techniques worked for others. For me, it was every once in a while I'd look in the mirror and say, do I like that man or woman in the mirror that I'm looking at? And I just said that early time in my life, I didn't love it. I didn't love that person. So don't put so much pressure on yourself that my God, if I make this wrong decision, it's over. Cuz outside of something around ethics and values, you can undo anything. 

If you want to go into accounting, start at one of the larger accounting firms. They’re more diverse in disciplines and age, but there are also a lot of similarities between people, so it’s a lot easier to find people you can talk to, trust, and lean on for support and guidance.

I was the first in my family to complete college, so I didn’t really have any educational guidance at home. My parents taught us good values, but I had to really push myself to work hard at school because that wasn’t something we were taught at home.

I put so much pressure on myself to reach work milestones earlier than expected that I lost sight of things like my health and relationships. I realize now that reaching milestones earlier doesn’t matter if you’re sacrificing other important things.

U.S. Chair & Senior Partner

You have to stay competitive to stand out and be successful.

Pressure

Self-Reflection

Values

Putting Pressure On Myself For Decisions That Didn’t Really Matter

When you were going into college, did it feel like you had any pressure from family or friends or just other people in your community to go to college or? &gt;&gt; I mean, I grew up in a family where education was the number one priority. Both my parents went to college. Three of my four grandparents have gone to college. And so it was kind of, it almost wasn't even a conversation, it was just an expectation that you would go to college. And that working hard and making the most of your education was expected. It's interesting when I think back on and also there was this huge expectation that you would use your education to do something that make the world better. My mom's parents were very involved in their community in Austin. They we're very politically involved and just really created that sense of it's what you do you use your education to, get good a opportunities for yourself and that is not about like making piles and piles of money that's about making the world better. I definitely had times while I was in college that I was sort of like how is this relevant to anything. [LAUGH] Cuz I think college can feel very, it's like you can be kind of in this bubble. It's amazing experience in some ways because it's all about learning and I think it's a lot about growing up and learning to live more independently and navigate your own social situations and all that kind of stuff. But I think for a lot of people, and this was true for me, especially if you're at a liberal arts college and not studying nursing or studying some track. The classes can feel a little bit like, what does this have to do with anything I ever think I'm gonna do. I mean, I'm old now, I'm 52. So I can look back on it and say do you think that you learn a lot in those experiences even if the particular content you're studying feels kind of irrelevant. Cuz you build a lot of skills, interpersonal skills, critical thinking skills, communication skills which are what you need to navigate the world successfully. 

Put effort into building your interpersonal, critical thinking, and communication skills while in college. You'll need those skills to navigate the world successfully. As far as majors go, my law degree has given me a lot of opportunities and extra knowledge, but it's not necessary to go to law school to make positive change in the world.

It was a huge expectation in my family that I would go to college and use my education to do something to make the world better. It was never just an option or even a conversation in my family.

I wanted to be a doctor but was discouraged by the difficulty of O-chem. I was taking history at the same time and loved it, so I took that path instead. It worked out because I gained valuable critical thinking skills that have helped a lot.

After law school, I worked at a big law firm but hated it. I felt like I was always on the wrong side of every issue I was working on. When I moved onto a smaller consulting firm, I saw that there are other ways to create change outside of law.

I'm the principal of an organization that works with companies to change their talent practices to be more inclusive of young people who might not have finished college or have gone through other hardships in life. We work to make sure companies aren't overlooking people who could be great employees but don't fit the company's traditional employee profile.

Principal

Education

Expectations And Opinions Of College

Along your journey through school and through your career, what are some obstacles that have stood in your way? &gt;&gt; Wow, where do I begin? [LAUGH] Well, I do think there's sort of two things that I would reflect on, one around the should. You should do this, you should do that, you should do this. And I think that we are so afraid when we're the first, when we're the pioneer that's making good on the hopes and the dreams of the family of messing it up and making the bad choice. So the idea of what you should do, I internalized that. And that was an obstacle, that I have to do this. I have to go to this school, I have to get this grade. There wasn't a lot of room for risk. So that was an external obstacle I think that with an unintended consequence. And then when I internalized it, I ended up over-engineering my life. If I had overcome that idea of what I should be, based on everybody else's idea of what I should be, I probably would have made a pivot much earlier from a career standpoint. 

Dispense with the notion of the dream school and start thinking about the dream experience. If you think about it that way, then you can't fail. Not getting into a particular program is no longer a failure. You've actually opened up a broader set of options for yourself that way.

I put a lot of pressure on myself to achieve success for my whole family. The best advice I've received is to run your own race and find success for yourself because your idea of success will be different than the ideas of others.

I internalized pressure from my family about what I should do regarding college. I was over-engineering my life to be perfect. If I had realized earlier that that's what was happening, I might have pivoted to something I was passionate about earlier.

I'm in charge of strategic partnerships and external engagement, so my days involve a lot of meetings, partnership pitches, and communications. I manage whatever strategic initiatives we have going on, which also involves a lot of communications through email, phone calls, meetings, and the like. I may also be working on an upcoming motivational speech or scheduling a public speaking event.

Senior Vice President

You have to do things a certain way and there's no room for risk.

An Obstacle I Had To Overcome

What was your support system like throughout all of your high school, elementary school and then college, and then now your career? &gt;&gt; I think that I come from a very supportive family, but a family of doers. And a mother who was, a mother and father, very hard working but in different ways. Neither of them went to college formally. I'm the first in my family to go to college. And so I think that the support network was there in terms of the ability that you can do and deliver. That comes with a heavy responsibility, because that means that you have to do the hopes and the dreams of the whole family are waiting on you. &gt;&gt; [LAUGH] &gt;&gt; When I started out right after college, the intention was to go to law school. And for no other reason except that my mother said to me, you should go to law school. And she's gonna hate that I'm retelling this story. &gt;&gt; [LAUGH] &gt;&gt; But you should go to law school because I've never met an unemployed lawyer. And so, we are very outcome-oriented. And I graduated from college and I applied to law school, and I applied to eight of them and I didn't get into one. And that was a very humbling experience, especially for me as a young person who was used to winning and getting everything. And so in having that early failure was really helpful and instructive. 

Family

Carrying The Weight Of The Hopes And Dreams Of Family

I think we could consider you a minority, right, when it comes to tech products. &gt;&gt; Sure, yeah. &gt;&gt; Tech fields or tech startup companies. I'm sure there's challenges, do you feel any animosity towards. &gt;&gt; Yeah. &gt;&gt; The females trying to start up? &gt;&gt; I get asked that question a lot, because there's not that many female founders, and there's particularly not that many female founders in tech, and very few in hardware. And, I've always approach it as just like, you be you, like I'm me. So I really don't think about that piece of it. And I don't know that that's, I just don't, I honestly don't. I think being a founder is really hard for anyone, whether you're a male or a female. So for me, it's a non issue. I don't think about it. But at the same time, I know that it is something for a lot of people. So as much as I can, I try to chat with other aspiring females who wanna be a founder or whatever, and they ask me for advise and I'm happy to give it. But I really generally just to my very best to take it as it's even. And I think if people start focusing on it, that's the problem. If you focus on the fact that you're a female, and you focus on the fact that there's very few, that's where you're going to lose that confidence, and you're going to step back and retreat. And not be able to do what everyone else, males and females, could do. So to me, I really try to make it sort of a non issue. 

Founder / CEO

Confidence

Doubt

Struggle

Being a Woman in Tech

I'd say flip your perspective. Your worst day could really be someone else's best day. And that's a really sobering thought. Those days when you're just like, my god, it's 1 AM and I have six different things. I didn't finish it and I got a bad grade on that exam and whatever, but you know what? Look where we are, I have this privilege of being in this incredible institution. Where I'm studying this major, where I'm gonna do x, y, and z, that's someone's best day. And that's a really cool thing to remember when at those moments, when it's really battling up and you wanna explode. And you're, so flip your perspective. 

Flip Your Perspective

Growing up, did your parents ever encourage you to go into technology, or did they knew that, that was sort of what you want to do, what you liked, what you did as a hobby? &gt;&gt; Yeah, well I know for me my parents weren't, you're going to go be a lawyer, you're going to be a doctor. They weren't anything like that. They were, we know you're creative, we know that you like to find things your passionate about. So find what you like, find what makes you happy and do that. And so that took off a lot of pressure of feeling like I had to, going back to, had to be a lawyer, a doctor to make them proud. I know there's a lot of people that they have to deal with that with their parents and so I was very fortunate to have parents that were, hey,just find something you like and do it well. Again they just encouraged as long as I was doing something that I liked and I'm sure that they appreciated that. Do something that you're not gonna get arrested, you're not gonna get in trouble. And so yeah, that's how they were 

Security Consultant

Pride

Parents

When I started my PhD I knew that I wanted to do coding. And I wanted to do math models, mechanics, materials. But I had no idea what I could do with that, what I could do with programming. I never thought about doing and actually I got this huge opportunity to go to Penn State to work with an amazing professor. On cardiac tissue engineering, but to do the numerical modeling, computer modeling and I said, wow, why not let's do it. And this is how I got this amazing position then at MIT because my professor here wanted someone who was able to bridge biomedical area and computational science. So, did I choose to do that? I would say, eventually I choose but it was an opportunity. Even if you have a good idea on what you want to do, listen to people. Watch people. Because you can get more ideas and maybe you will change your mind. No, don't put pressure on yourself. This is my advice. 

Versatility is more and more relevant to any job position, do not be afraid to stretch yourself in college by combining your core disciplines with other unrelated subjects.

I grew up in France and went to graduate school there. I came to the US when I got offered an opportunity at MIT. There is a language barrier sometimes, but the thing about science, math, and computers is that it is the same in any language. 

I was the first person in my family to get a PhD and the first person to go into a science field. I didn't really have anybody to help me navigate. 

Growing up, my family never had the money to buy me a computer. I wasn't able to buy my first computer until age 18. I had very little interaction with technology up until then. 

At MIT, I develop mathematical and computer models to simulate the mechanical response of human tissues. About 60% of my day is spent utilizing coding to study the effects of trauma on human tissues. With PATRONNÈ, I run a lifestyle and advice magazine and a community for professional women. I work with women to share their experiences and help support each other through classes. 

Postdoctoral Associate

You are a woman, you can't do computer science or engineering. 

Pressure

Putting Pressure On Myself For Decisions That Didn’t Really Matter

Tim Ryan

109 videos on Pressure: